Posts Tagged tip for the day

Beowulf: Warrior, Magician & Therapist

Beowulf.firstpage

Written some 1500 years ago, by an anonymous bard, Beowulf tells the story of a gallant hero who travels north to Denmark to slay the swamp beast, Grendel.

(Image: first page of Beowulf manuscript)

Grendel would visit the local King Hrothgar’s castle and set about killing all whom it encountered, carrying severed limbs and bodies back to its lair at the bottom of a deep dark lake.

Beowulf slays Grendel. That night there is much merriment and feasting, Beowulf and his men retire to a far part of the castle.  A second creature enters the hall where many still celebrate. The creature, Grendel’s mother, the source of the problem, wreaks her revenge. Like Grendel, she retires to her lair and Beowulf sets off after her.

The presenting problem is never the real problem. The real problem lies behind all the presenting problems. When the real problem disappears, so do all of its presenting problems.

Beowulf approaches the edge of the lake. Below him in the deep dark abyss lies the beast in her lair. Before he descends there is great temptation to withhold and draw back but with courage – afforded by the finest sword, shield and armour – Beowulf steps forward and descends into the darkness, his darkness. Below, he and the beast engage in battle. He finds the magnificent sword, shield and armour – that protect him so well on the surface – serve no use in the darkness. Beowulf casts them off. He reveals his unprotected self, his complete vulnerability. Beowulf and the beast become one in combat and as they wrestle, Beowulf finds a luminous sword of light that hangs on the wall of the lair – a sword with which he slays the beast.

As Beowulf rises to the surface to reveal the beast’s head, he finds that the luminous sword dissolves. The luminous sword that worked in the darkness has no power in the known world. It leaves Beowulf unable to demonstrate its power. For others to understand the sword’s power, they must descend into darkness and find it for themselves. They must experience their own victory. They must choose courage.

We cannot stare at the sun in a noon-day cloudless sky.
Light cannot be seen in the light.
At midnight, the cloudless sky reveals infinity.
By clouds, I mean ‘clouds of emotion’ – shame, anger, sadness and fear.
Glory comes from our journey into the darkness.

 

Shine on…!
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Paul C Burr
Author of Learn to Love and Be Loved in Return, 2012: a twist in the tail and Defrag your Soul

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Shame, Not-self-love, Is the First Step toward Mind Control

GuiltAs a child I was taught to (do things that) please God and fear the Devil. By the age of 12, I allowed a cleric’s sermon to make me feel ashamed for all the ‘wrong’ things I did, thought and felt – like most young folk do, think and feel as they reach puberty. Much later I realised that guilt or shame is half of the ‘carrot and stick’ deal that parents, governments and some religions use to ‘control’ children, the populace and followers respectively.

Illustration by Andrea Kurucz

When you allow someone else to make you feel not good about yourself, you accede to their first step in mind control. Their intent is that you do their bidding, not your own.

To avoid mind control, you need to understand the nature of your own shame; you need to venture into your own ‘underworld’ to find the sources of that shame. Especially those things your parents did that made you feel ashamed as a child and perhaps hid away deep within you unknowingly.

You may not know consciously all the sources of shame you possess and may need some form of ‘plutonic’ awakening to unearth them.  Shame is a gap between how you perceive you are and how you’d like to be. In my life I’ve been ashamed of being overweight, of hurting people but the deepest and most profound shame (that I’ve only recently discovered) was that I was not worthy of my parents’ love. And if I was not worthy of their love, I was not worthy of self-love. And if I was not worthy of self-love then I was worthy to love someone else – because I can’t give what I don’t possess. My shame stultified my capacity to love and be loved in return.

When you do something out of shame you may allay feeling that shame, but you never rid yourself of it. You can’t atone shame – but you can release it. You release shame by practicing self-forgiveness.

I’ve shared how my understanding of forgiveness has evolved in two previous blogs (Replace Forgiveness with Accountability and Client:-”I Can’t Forgive Myself.” – “You Don’t Need To.”).

In a nutshell:

Self-forgiveness is not about one part of you saying to another, “Even though you did wrongly I forgive you”. It’s about releasing all judgement.

 Shame is a form of not-self-love that lives in your head, rent free. Self-forgiveness is allowing that not-self-love to leave completely.

 When not-self-love leaves, all that remains is self-love; what’s in your head aligns with the love you hold in your heart.

You become love wholly.

You shine!

Shine on…!
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Paul C Burr
Author of Learn to Love and Be Loved in Return, 2012: a twist in the tail and Defrag your Soul

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TftD: The Paradox of Joy and Hurt

hurt happy“The person who hurts you is often the person you run to, in order to feel better.”

Image sourced from Moments Count

Shine on…!

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Paul C Burr

Author of Learn to Love and Be Loved in Return, 2012: a twist in the tail and Defrag your Soul

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May ‘La Force’ Be With You

Willpower + Commitment + Self Trust = Faith in Yourself

Slightly revised extract from Defrag your Soul

Hu-man did not invent the wheel, the steam engine, the aeroplane or the nuclear bomb without the capacity to imagine each invention in the first place – along with willpower, commitment and trust in its own ability to create such inventions. The same holds true for the future you seek for yourself.

11 StrengthTo invoke such ‘magic’ you need to perceive your ‘image-in-ions’ as highly desirable and have faith in yourself. You may find you need that faith in yourself for many other reasons:

The road can be long and hard.

 I found thousands of ways how not to make a light bulb.

I only needed one way to make it work.

(Paraphrased from) Thomas Edison

You can meet many setbacks and stumbling blocks. Being a Leo, I’ve found affairs of the heart to be the biggest area of learning. The area, more than anywhere else, where in the past I have disowned facets about myself. Such setbacks and heartaches required a vast amount of patience with myself as well.

You may be ridiculed, ignored and isolated.

 All truth passes through three stages. First, it is ridiculed. Second, it is violently opposed. Third, it is accepted as being self-evident.

Arthur Schopenhauer

Revolutionaries: Albert Einstein, Mahatma Gandhi, Oscar Wilde and Pink Floyd were all ridiculed either by their peers or the media before the world accepted the beauty and wisdom of their works.

When truth attempts to usurp not-truth, those protectors of not-truth in power often do all they can to suppress it; without bringing it or the truth tellers to the public’s attention.

Although I am a typical loner in my daily life, my awareness of belonging to the invisible community of those who strive for truth, beauty and justice has prevented me from feelings of isolation.

Albert Einstein

In my early years when I first got into spirituality, I was prone to be outwardly enthusiastic about my journey within. Most of the people around me were not into ‘it’ at all.

When, for instance at a wine party, I started spouting off about “shining light into my inner darkness”, I would get different types of response.  The minority would show interest but the silent majority would remain quiet and walk away to join another group who talked about ‘normal’ things. Some who objected strongly to what I was saying would let me know of their views in no uncertain terms. Others would ridicule me face to face or behind my back. It is often easier to ridicule something than to face it; especially when that something invokes fear in you.

There’s a paradox too. If I’m attracting ridicule, is it because I fear it? Probably yes. In the meantime, I do my best to avoid responding to ridicule with ridicule or any other animalistic response. Sometimes I fail.

You may choose to isolate or distance yourself.

I go to the occasional reunion where others see changes in me. I no longer take much interest in ‘normal’ day-to-day small talk, like who is going to win ‘the current Saturday night TV contest’ or get thrown out of some ‘reality’ show. Many of my interests have changed and, perhaps more significantly, my perspective has changed.

For example, I feel distanced when people complain about being the victims of an economic recession that we have collectively created. At the same time, I ask myself, “Why have I attracted this conversation? I wonder where I am not being accountable for what I receive in life; whom or what am I blaming?”

I do not consider myself superior in any way and do my best not to come across as an evangelist. It’s that I’ve moved on. If people ask my opinion about the latest TV game show, I probably don’t have one. If we’re discussing global events, I speak my views.

I prefer to distance myself from day-to-day chatter or ‘complaining about the system’ – both of which I might have engaged in once upon a time.

I still ‘rabbit on’ a lot about two of my passions though: football and music (probably more than I do about spirituality J) and, undoubtedly, I distance a few people from myself in the process as well.

You may be opposed violently.

When all other attempts at their suppression fail, truth tellers face their sternest test; to stand firm and risk physical harm from those who stand to fall by truth. I could cite religious, political and civil-rights leaders, pacifists and innocent people – all whom have been attacked, beaten and some murdered ignominiously to prevent truth from being revealed to, or sustained in, the world.

What others do not do to you, you may do to yourself.

Without willpower, you limit the depth of your learning; you only go so far and you only get so much in return. When you commit yourself 100% to a project, that’s what you can receive in return, 100%. On the other hand, if you commit less than 100%, you get at best what you put into it and sometimes you get nothing. Ask any seasoned salesperson.

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Act as if you make a difference. Act as if you count. Act as if and you will…

Notice the focus is on your journey, more than the outcome.

From Warrior to Magician

By Paul C Burr

Toward the flower in full bloom,

Full Truth in the noonday sun.

Devoid of ego, it casts no shadow.

With no nooks and crannies to hold darkness,

All it can now do is give of itself.

Unafraid of being cut down (crucified) by those, in power, who fear Truth.

 

The Warrior stands bereft of armour, sword and shield,

Secure in what they know is Truth.

No words of explanation required.

No fear to control or manage.

The darkness embraced.

The fear dissolved.

 

Armed with only Truth and compassion,

The Warrior thus becomes the Magician.

This is the way of the Tarot.

This is the true definition of White Magic.

Tis called redemption.

Shine on…!
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Paul C Burr
Author of Learn to Love and Be Loved in Return, 2012: a twist in the tail and Defrag your Soul

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TftD: Coincidence, Synchronicity, Clairvoyance and Magic

police synchronicity

Happen to the world rather than have the world happen to you.

Keep a log of your life’s little (and big ) coincidences. Reflect on the mindset you hold that invokes these coincidences.

Image from The Police

Two days ago I was watching my favourite football team Newcastle United play Anzi. It was 0-0 with about a minute of normal time to go. I turned to the guy next to me and said, “It would be great if Cissé scored in the 2nd minute of extra time again” (as he’d done in Newcastle’s previous game, last Sunday against Stoke). Lo and behold, you know or can guess what happened next.

The same evening I was at a meeting where we discussed the ‘kill-all-bacteria’ panacea that hospitals deploy these days, rather than simply use hot soapy water and keep things clean. (Personally I’d rather learn to live with bacteria rather than encourage the mutation of the super-bugs we find in hospitals these days – but that’s another blog.)

Carefully+laid+out+skeletons+thought+to+be+from+a+14th+century+burial+groundSubsequently, the next morning, I was deep in thought about the Black Death plague that swept throughout Britain in 1348. (This was a time when people would deposit their chamberpots out of the bedroom window???) Ten minutes later I switched on the TV news to see that a mass grave full of Black Death victims had been unearthed during digging work on a new railway system in London.

I’ve experienced ‘coincidences’ regularly like these in recent years. So I’ve decided to keep a log of my (Law of Reversibility?) experiences and will keep you posted on what I learn. Please share with me what you learn should you choose to do this exercise.

It’s no coincidence that you’re reading this!

Shine on…!
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Paul C Burr
Author of  Learn to Love and Be Loved in Return, 2012: a twist in the tail and Defrag your Soul

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Tip for the Day: Truth in a Relationship

truthTruth drives out falsity, the mother of lack-of-trust. When trust, the bedrock of a relationship, crumbles you have nothing to build on.

Image sourced from Jeff Beck

Shine on…!
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Paul C Burr
Author of Learn to Love and Be Loved in Return, 2012: a twist in the tail and Defrag your Soul
Follow @paulburr

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Self-Coaching Tool about Relationships.

Social web network marketing diagram.

Rather than seeing success as a specific outcome, change your focus to seeing it as a network of  ’10 out of 10′ relationships. When everyone who can stop you achieving success is onside – there is no one and nothing to stop you.

Image sourced from Think Holistic, Act Personal

You cannot achieve success without forging equally successful relationships – starting with the relationship you have with yourself.

Think of a business or personal situation that’s important to you right now.

Who are all the people (include yourself) who can stop you from being successful (i.e. they have the power of veto)?

Give your relationship with each person a score out of 10, where 10 means ‘the relationship with this person is exactly where we both want it to be’.

To get the relationship to a 10, what does each person on the list want from you?

Are you willing to give it? (And what might you want in return?)

If so when?

Go give.

Shine on…!
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Paul C Burr
Author of Learn to Love and Be Loved in Return, 2012: a twist in the tail and Defrag your Soul

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Tip for the Day: The Purpose of Duality

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Take a quiet moment to yourself. What’s the biggest issue you face? Now look at yourself in an imaginary mirror. Which part of you attracted that issue? For what purpose?

Remember the ‘wet and dry’ of life. You can’t know what love or joy is without knowing what not-love and not-joy is.

21 Wisdom

Wisdom

Life’s journey is about discerning that part of you that attracts love from that part that doesn’t – and putting that wisdom into practice.

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(If you feel you can’t put your heart and soul into practice then ‘act as if’. Pretend, like an innocent child, with no ulterior motive other than the curiosity of seeing what happens.)

Picture sourced from Handwriting Analysis

Shine on…!
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Paul C Burr
Author of Learn to Love and Be Loved in Return, 2012: a twist in the tail and Defrag your Soul

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Tip for the Day: Combine Patience with Serenity

13 Patience

Patience

12 Serenity

Serenity

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Practise patience and view all things around you with serene eyes. The world will no longer withold the love you were born to receive.

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(If you feel you can’t put your heart and soul into practice then ‘act as if’. Pretend, like an innocent child, with no ulterior motive other than the curiosity of seeing what happens.)

Pictures sourced from Handwriting Analysis

Shine on…!
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Paul C Burr
Author of Learn to Love and Be Loved in Return, 2012: a twist in the tail and Defrag your Soul.

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New Moon in Pisces Tonight and Comet PAN-STARRS visits

comet-panstarrs New Moon at 19:51 GMT, 11 March 2013: a time of new beginnings and/or emotional awakenings and with 7 planets in Pisces…. it should be powerful.

With Mercury in retrograde – these awakenings might occur because you have a re-think about something or you may re-awaken to an idea that you once had. this could also be a good time to re-invent yourself.

Comet PAN-STARRS is making a close approach to Earth this week. Check it out (once the snow blizzards have gone here in UK) in the Northern sky just after sunset. Hopefully we’ll get a good siting because it won’t be back for a 100 million years – so its kinda special, is it not?

Picture sourced from Discovery Magazine

Shine on…!
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Paul C Burr
Author of Learn to Love and Be Loved in Return, 2012: a twist in the tail and Defrag your Soul

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A Common Business Issue: Lack of Accountability Is a Symptom. The Problem is Fear

truthvmythWhen we are over-performing, the stage of success is filled with major players and acolytes; all accountable for their right to stand in the blazing footlights. On the other hand, when we underperform; the stage is often deserted apart from the chosen few, caught in the beam of a single spotlight, being asked to account for themselves.

The idea of measuring people to improve ‘accountability’ is also a hierarchical myth. Over-performers apart, it results in form filling to meet the ‘numbers’ and dodge the truth if needed – be it in the private (e.g. sales forecasting) or public (e.g. centralization of schools/hospitals statistics) sectors. A corporate board member of the world’s largest IT company referred this phenomenon to me as “…‘management’s perfumed pig’. What we need instead is truth!”
You, I, we, tick the boxes with answers so that hopefully, in management’s eyes, we aren’t singled out from the crowd. So where is the truth found?

Image courtesy of the Nikki Thomas Network

The journey starts by a commitment to treat successes and setbacks, as opportunities to learn what to repeat and avoid, with equanimity. Secondly, we answer fundamental questions about our behaviour and its effect:

  • What is it we do that aids/abets and what is the effect of this ‘helpful’ behaviour?
  • What is it we do that inhibits/hinders and what is the effect of this ‘unhelpful’ behaviour?
  • In the latter case, what could we do differently and what effect might that have?
  • Overall, what do we do/don’t do; knowingly/unknowingly that creates or somehow contributes to the successes and setbacks of ourselves and others?
  • And even if we were wise to all the answers to the above questions, do we choose the courage to act upon ‘the wisdom from failure’?

Lack of accountability is only the symptom. The problem is fear.

People are fearful of being perceived as failing or incompetent (by themselves as much as others). People thus fear being accountable.
If management were to have only one task, it’s not about measuring, it’s about releasing the fear in their organization and filling the subsequent void created with wisdom and courage.

An organization releases its fear and gets wise one person at a time, each of their own volition.

 

Shine on…!
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Paul C Burr

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Taking Spir(itu)al Steps

le mat le-bateleur

“When you achieve mastery at one level, you become a blithering idiot at the next level up, at the same time.”

Dr Thomas Maughan, Chief Druid, The Druid Order, London, 1964-76

Read more….. in Kindred Spirit magazine

Shine on…!
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Paul C Burr

Author of Learn to Love and Be Loved in Return, 2012: a twist in the tail and Defrag your Soul.

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If you want a successful relationship you need to feel good about yourself.

Tree of AveburyThe seed of a strong relationship, its foundation, must grow into a solid root(ed in truth). Otherwise, we create an unsustainable imbalance. The relationship will eventually topple or die on the vine because it lacks equilibrium.

Lack of equilibrium between two people, develops when:

  1. One partner destabilises the other by bringing them down (and keeping them there).
  2. The ‘stronger’ reinforces this and reminds the ‘weaker’ partner of the consequences of their actions
  3. The ‘stronger’ provides the ‘weaker’ with the solution to their ills. But this is the ‘stronger’ partner’s will and bidding, not the ‘weaker’ partner.

Like a seed, a relationship starts its life very much in the dark. We know not of what lies ahead – nor appreciate what it (the seed of the relationship) can become. After the flush of ecstasy during the first few days/weeks/months together, something unexpected happens. One or both partners find themselves getting upset.

People, who get upset easily, will not succeed in the onerous setbacks that most relationships (or challenging journeys) bring from time to time. The more upset we get, the more we do not feel good about ourselves and the more we often hide about ourselves.

We may bottle our feelings up at first. We keep quiet. We fear that we will upset (or not be seen as good enough by) our partner. Eventually, when we reach exasperation point, we can boil over and let our negative emotions fly. It’s not love that lets fly, it’s fear.

Four escalating, warning signs that tell you are heading for a setback in your relationship (extract from Learn to Love and Be Loved in Return):

We all go down this path now and then. It becomes easier to avoid the path to disappointment and setback, once you can read the signs:

  1. You easily get upset; means your pride is hurt. When you get emotional quickly and easily, you give your power to those you get upset with. You are clouded with emotion. You cannot see out what to do. Others cannot see in. You isolate yourself.
  2. Less power leads to low self esteem. You do not feel good about yourself. This leads to fear.
  3. Fear of further upset and isolation: in extreme cases you despair and turn to others and do their bidding – in order to maintain some form of connection. This is not love or friendship. It is….
  4. Mind control: someone else has you under their thumb. This is not love. It is manipulation of power. You have no way out, until you release the fear to get out from under.

As real as it feels, fear is illusory. And illusion is only dispelled by truth. For a relationship to fulfill its potential wholly, it must pass through the stage in its development called ‘truth’, in which there are no hidden agendas. Feelings and intentions are shared openly and honestly.

We observe a spiral effect. As fear is dispelled, (and as) more truth is revealed, more fear is dispelled, and so on. Counter-wise, fear serves to hide the truth, which when hidden creates more fear, and so on. (Such a fear-based relationship thus cannot get past the hidden agendas that hold it back.)

We choose with every decision we make, which way the relationship travels the spiral, up or down, truth or fear, oneness or separateness, love or power (control).

Real love is borne inside out. We need to feel good about ourselves from the inside, and not solely because someone else (i.e. our partner) makes us feel good about ourselves. We thus free ourselves to stand in our truth without any shield behind which to hide our fears. It can appear that we are making ourselves defenceless. But truth drives out falsity. Our defencelessness is thus our strength, to share a relationship rooted in truth.

Shine on…!
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Paul C Burr

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The Jigsaw Puzzle of Life

building jigsaw

Photo puzzle showing Patrauti church, UNESCO World Heritage Site, Suceava, Bucovina, Romania

 

I remember my (Great-) Aunty Rita from my young childhood days. She loved gargantuan jigsaw puzzles. Aunty Rita taught my Cousin Mike and I how to start by sifting out and connecting together all the pieces that had straight edges, to establish the boundary of some 1000+ piece puzzle. It would typically be a huge landscape with many decorative features and often a lot of blue sky.

Having completed the edge, we knew that every remaining piece fitted inside its boundary. We weren’t allowed to step outside. With the rules established, we’d next tackle any large feature, say a building, which stood out from the background. If it was a grey building, for example, we’d hunt for pieces that had what looked like the outline of the building running through them – a straight edge with grey one side and background the other. We’d piece them together and then search for and insert further grey pieces, some with bits of a door or window in them. Eventually, when the building was complete, we’d feel proud that we had a discernible part of the jigsaw to show for our work.

Slowly, we’d work through all the features of the jigsaw; piecing togther their outlines first and then filling them in. This strategy, by and large, seemed to work fine until…Jigsaw puzzle

Picture courtesy of Roberson, Small Business Consulting.

Blue Sky, Nothing but Blue Sky (extract from my 3rd book, Defrag your Soul)

When faced with blue sky, our ‘fill-in-the-outline-first’ strategy, to complete the picture, no longer worked. We had to revert to visual trial and error. We didn’t have the nous to get a ‘feel’ for where each piece slotted correctly, the first time around. We’d pick up a piece that looked the right shape and test it one way then the other. Sometimes we’d see if the piece in our hand fitted in a number of vacant slots.

On occasion, we’d try and force a piece, which looked very nearly right, into place. When we realised the error of our ways we’d extract it. We needed to be careful because if we removed the offending piece quickly, out of frustration, we would drag up some neighbouring jigsaw pieces with it. We would then have to reconnect the pieces we’d torn from their sockets. We learned to stay cool when things didn’t fit into place the way we wanted them to.

Fitting ‘blue sky’ jigsaw pieces together, proved a good analogy for my trial and error approach to getting my own way as a child. If I gave out a howl when I didn’t get my own way, I soon got to know about it. (I immediately felt the discomfort of trying to insert an ill-fitting jigsaw piece to my ‘blue sky’.) If I tried to force the issue (i.e. the wrong piece in the wrong place), I’d ‘rip out’ any ‘credits for good behaviour’ that I carried at the time.

Hissy fits were not tolerated. I found out at a very young age how to discern between acceptable, polite behaviour and the opposite. I found out what being a ‘good boy’ meant partly through the responses I got when I was ‘naughty’ – and how being a ‘very naughty boy’ could result in a very unpleasant reprimand.

Like many kids I tested the boundaries. How far could I go with ‘naughtiness’? What could I get away with? Where would I find the line not to cross? Where and when did I need to temper my behaviour to get what I want and avoid punishment?

Howling and carping on about things I wanted to happen didn’t work but neither did keeping quiet. How could I let people know what I wanted if I didn’t speak out? So I instinctively learned how to temper my approach to influence others. I learned about temperance.

What about other ‘blue sky’ feelings such as love and security (never mind the shame, anger, sadness and fear that can ensue when we don’t get love and security)?

We hopefully provide our children with love and security. I can think of no happier sight than seeing an innocent child, smiling and living life to the full, knowing that they themself feel completely safe and secure.

This begs questions, When do we set them free to stand on their own feet? How will the child learn about insecurity (not security) and not-love? When do (or could) they start to learn about shame, anger, sadness, fear? How will they cope with trauma?

The answer is, “Do what feels right. They will call these experiences for themselves when the time is right regardless”.

It’s only recently that I’ve realised the dualistic metaphorical jigsaw nature of how you learn about life. For example, to appreciate love, you need to learn what not-love is. Otherwise how could you discern when you love (or are loved by) someone? And to fully understand the term ‘unconditional love’ you need to learn what ‘conditional love’ is.

Furthermore, the picture in the metaphorical jigsaw is not static. It’s a movie that changes with life’s ebb and flow of breath, days, years, relationships and so on. What creates success one day can create a setback another and vice versa.

Times change. People change. Contexts change. Nature demands change. You evolve, if nothing else, to survive. You learn from successes and setbacks. For example, if you consistently show the same anger to different people, you probably won’t get the same response or outcome. You can also find yourself continually fitting a piece of anger to a situation where only patience will fit. There’s ‘a  right fitting piece’ to every situation you attract in life but it might require great subtlety, instinct or sensitivity to find it – for there are many pieces to choose from.

Life’s Jigsaw has an infinite number of pieces. It evolves into a lifelong movie that you get to act in and direct (sometimes partly and sometimes wholly) for yourself. And the most challenging parts to act and direct tend to be the ‘blue sky’ pieces.

So the art or perhaps science of life is how to reduce the trials and errors that can cause upset and piece together its ‘blue sky’ pieces more efficiently. How do you respond to those situations that happen to us all and only a few know how to handle effectively – the ‘blue sky’ pieces – the known unknowns?

Knowing you don’t know is learning in itself. It is the first step up from not knowing what you don’t know or unconscious incompetence, life’s starting place. Training professionals call this first step, conscious (of) incompetence. Through practice, experience and ideally having a role model to copy, you can become consciously competent, i.e. you know what to do but you have to think about it. For example, when I was learning to drive I was told to change gear every 10mph. So I used to know which gear I should be in by reading the speed gauge consciously.

Eventually, you get a feel for what needs to be done. You attend to what’s needed intuitively. This state is called unconscious competence. You do what’s needed without thinking about it.

Through experience and maturity you hopefully learn how to piece together ‘blue sky’ pieces to Life’s Jigsaw – such as love, decision making, patience or coping with trauma. What about when you attempt to go beyond the puzzle’s edge? Here you find the unknown unknowns – for example, buried emotions or childhood pacts you made with yourself that you didn’t know you carried around with you. Here you find yourself back where you started life, unconscious incompetence.
(To be continued…)

Shine on…!
/|\
Paul C Burr
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Temperance

Jean_Dodal_Tarot_trump_14

…does not mean ‘do without or prohibit’.

It means balance.

Temperance: Major Arcana card no 14, from the Ancient Tarot Deck of Marseilles by Jean Dodal, 1718.

Remove balance in life and you limit your perspective. The workaholic might not give themselves the time to enjoy a healthy personal life. The addict can’t see outside the control of their habit. The drunkard inebriates themselves from sobriety. In all three cases, the protagonist lives their life in denial.

Should you avoid temperance, not only do you limit your learning, you can do yourself harm – physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. As such, you harm the environment you live in and those nearest and dearest to you. Lack of temperance, by definition, means an excess of, or gluttony for, one thing over another. Be it work, alcohol, drugs, mindless TV or computer games – the excess means that you deny yourself health, which has consequences.

Have you ever watched downhill tobogganing on TV? The more often a sleigh hits the wall, the more it slows down through friction. And when it bounces off sideways the team are using their energy laterally to get back on track. Whilst it’s traversing it has to travel farther than a direct descent down the middle of the run. The middle way is the fastest and smoothest.

Study the Temperance card, from the 18th Century, Ancient Tarot Deck of Marseilles, by Jean Dodal. You observe a grounded female angel clad evenly in red (fire, hot, male) and blue (water, cool, female). Her arms are dressed in red, to signify strength and power of Mars. Her blue covered torso signifies the love and beauty of Venus. Water from the higher cup flows into and cleanses that of the lower. Not a drop is spilt or wasted; the flow is steady and harmonious. Her wings reveal she is an angel who may advise, guide and protect us. Her work embraces the harmony of opposites.

The Angel of Temperance teaches us that life’s direction leads eventually to the middle path. We do not need to swing extremely and continually between feast and famine, peace and war, love and hate, mercy and severity, prosperity and poverty, abundance and scarcity, riches and debt, victory and defeat, mine and yours, property and theft. When we embrace both aspects of duality as one, we create oneness. Something is only good for one, when it is good for all. There is no us and them, there is no me without not me. There is only us, together we become oneness.

When we bring temperance into our lives, we exemplify oneness.

(extract from my forthcoming book, from Defrag your Soul, due out next week.)

Shine on…!
/|\
Paul C Burr

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2012 – The Return to Oneness

2012 BoliviaThe Return

“Enough! I’ve had enough of winning and losing.

I can only exert a limited amount of power.

I can only spend a limited amount of money.

I can only create so much suffering before I kill off those over whom I am victorious.

 I can only suffer so much when I lose.

I have exhausted all the possibilities of winning and losing in the material world.

I now choose temperance.

I return to the harmony of opposites, the yin and yang, the will and imagination, to return to oneness.”

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Defrag your Soul: audio recording of talk about parts of the this forthcoming book, due for publication Summer 2012

Click here: DEFRAG YOUR SOUL
Transform your Consciousness:
a practical guide for the beginner and seasoned traveller within…

Illustration by Andrea Kurucz, selected as part of a gallery of drawings for Defrag your Soul.

Extended extract from a talk I gave to the National Federation of Spiritual Healers, on Saturday 12 May 2012, in central London. The talk contains some topics from my book, Defrag your Soul, due for publication in Summer of 2012.
Parts of the talk include:

  1. Beyond NLP
  2. What is your purpose in life?
  3. Duality
  4. How do you take spiritual steps on your journey within? How do you know you’ve taken them?
  5. The Etheric Body aka The Vital Body
  6. The links between the Etheric Body and Health
  7. The path to magic

Shine on…!
/|\
Paul C Burr

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Your Inner Child Has a Message…..

By listening carefully to the voice of your inner child, you develop your intuition. You tune into its messages. Call it “intunition.” At the same time, you become aware of the feeling when you veer away from the child’s advice. You detune. You cease to trust yourself.
Self trust is the “engine oil” to give and receive the very best, to and from the world around you. Not-self trust means you give and receive second best at best. You undervalue yourself and your immense power.

Extract from my forthcoming book, 2012: A Twist in the Tale, that I intend to serialise on its own blogsite. Watch this space.

Image sourced from Abused Empowered Survive Thrive

 

Shine on…!
/|\
Paul C Burr

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The Alchemy of Life: from Low Self Worth to Self Worth

When you filter out, ignore or deny feelings of low self worth, you filter out self worth as well. Remember, the “wet and dry” of life. You can’t know one without the other. So life is about knowing self worth and its shadow, low-self worth. When you understand both and how to transmute the shadow into light, then you understand the alchemy of life.

Image sourced from Spagyric Arts

Shine on…!
/|\
Paul C Burr

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Love your Bubble of Fear

Allow your fear into your consciousness. Place it in a bubble. Neither attempt to hold the bubble nor prod it. Let the bubble float freely. Surround the bubble skin with love. Be patient. Wait for love’s miraculous power of osmosis to weave its magic. The fear will wave farewell.

Image sourced from Fine Art America

Shine on…!
/|\
Paul C Burr

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