Paul C Burr
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Posts Tagged true nature
The Journey to Self-worth, Self-love and ultimately, Love – Starts with…
Posted by Doctapaul in Blog All, book, Coaching, Leadership, Life's Changes, Love, Mindfulness, Personal, Pitfalls I've Fallen Into, Relationships, Self Development, Self Help, Soundbytes of Wisdom, Tip for the Day on December 19, 2014
(This blog is an extract from a forthcoming book I’m writing with the working title, How to be a Friend of the Devil Within)
Three Constituents and their Dualities…
- Accept vulnerabilities: as necessary to the human condition. Avoid allowing them to dictate your actions. Avoid denying them. Learning from vulnerability is fundamental to knowing what being invulnerable means. That’s the paradox of duality – you know something is wet because you know it’s not not-wet, i.e. dry.
To understand invulnerability, allow yourself to ‘be ok being vulnerable’. As you learn more about vulnerability (defencelessness), you learn more about ‘not-vulnerabilty’, invulnerability.
Image courtesy of Cernonnos
Defencelessness becomes your strength – when you learn to apply its wisdom.
- Learn to be okay with uncertainty. For example, when you commit to a journey, you may not arrive at your intended destination. Likewise, when you allow yourself to fall in love, that love may be rejected or lost. Learn to avoid trying to control people to adhere to your will. Love is only achieved through choice and freedom and living with the uncertainty that choice and freedom imply. Put another way…
If you want to change something stop trying to control it.
- Self-love does not mean that you or life has to be perfect. You were designed to be incomplete. By all means strive to improve yourself or the life you lead AND ‘don’t beat yourself up for being imperfect’. You, your friends and acquaintances, your children and your enemies, none are perfect.
This is what researcher and storyteller, Brené Brown, says about raising children in a generation that has the highest rate of drug dependency, obesity and debt in history…
Our job is to say (to our children), “You know what? You are imperfect, you are wired to struggle – BUT you are worthy of love and belonging”. That’s our job. Show me a generation of children raised like that and we’ll end, I think, the problems we see today.
Brené Brown: The Power of Vulnerability
Be clear about your intended outcomes and commit to the journey to achieve them. The outcomes will not necessarily be spiritual. Yet the journey to complete – that which is incomplete (incomplete self-worth, incomplete self-love and incomplete love) – is always spiritual.
Your True Nature Creates Love
Being okay with the three states: vulnerability, uncertainty and imperfection, means that you no longer hold yourself back with emotions (anger, shame, hurt and fear) that stop you from expressing your true nature. Not feeling angry, hurt, ashamed or fearful allows you to embrace these four disabling-emotions’ dualities (enabling-emotions):
1. Not-anger = compassion and patience
2. Not-shame = self-worth and faith-in-self
3. Not-hurt = joy and serenity
4. Not-fear = love.
Your true nature is to…
Create love, moment by moment, through a cocktail of compassion, patience, self worth, faith-in-self, completeness, serenity, and joy – with a twist of enthusiasm and will-power.
Shine on… & a Happy Winter Solstice!
Paul C Burr
Business/Personal Performance Coach & Author Facebook: Beowulf (>16,000 followers) Follow @paulburr
#mindfulness, abusive relationships, accountability, Alchemy, Ancient Wisdom, anger, character, consciousness, courage, daily thought, druid, druidism, druidry, fear, forgiveness, Gnostic, Gnosticism, guilt, hurt, karma, law of attraction, law of consequence, Law of Reversibility, leadership, life purpose, love, metaphysical, mindfulness, pagan, paganism, relationship problems, relationships, responsibility, soul, spiral path, spiritual, spiritual science, tip, tip for the day, true nature, Truth, unconditional love, unconscious mind, words of wisdom
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About Quick Guide: How Top Salespeople Sell, “I work for a large American IT company, and can say this is a hugely powerful book to articulate what is required to get to Board level. To really understand what the CEO and C level executive summarise as valuable and impactful, and in a condensed easy-to-digest format, is phenomenal. I find Paul C Burr's style of writing easier to digest and apply in any sales situation; it crystallises where the true business value add is delivered and how you really have strategic partnerships. I have just got number 2 book and look forward to reading this with excitement - which is saying something as my concentration span can be limited. Thank you.” - Amy Lambkin, Amazon review
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You gave me the greatest gift I could ever have received which is to know my own being, and this is why I will always be grateful, and never forget our work last week. I now have found the path to not only happiness, but wisdom too. They say happy is the wise man, and I might add happy is this wise woman, through meeting a wise man, thank you again.”
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Emma Andrews – Brighton
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“I already feel very differently. It can be hard to come to terms with change when it's not what you want, even though you know resistance is futile, but now I can see where I'm headed, it's easier to accept that the change is already in progress and that it's a good thing, thanks again.”
Gemma (via telephone), London
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C. L. Eveleigh (Reading, UK)
This review is from: Learn to Love & Be Loved in Return: Making Relationships Last (Paperback)
This is a book about much more than romantic relationships. It is written with wonderful honesty and sincerity about love, the breakdown of relationships and how we relate to one another. It is a book that provides great insights into our own behaviour, as well as how we relate to others. It immensely readable, and I'm finding myself dipping into it over and over again for the many ideas, exercises and insights within its covers. Highly recommended whether you are in a relationship, just starting one, or looking for a relationship that will last.
Paul’s engaging style and personable character perfectly suit professional coaching. I have completed a recent programme. My performance, at work, has gone from strength to strength. I am now equipped with the tools to take me to previously unimagined business heights. Thank you Paul!
Robert Syrad, Erevena, Executive Search Services
Paul’s genius for business coaching helped me get clarity on a number of issues very quickly. I trust Paul as my coach. I appreciate his honesty and business expertise. In particular, I really value Paul’s flexibility in stepping into the role of a mentor, when he can see the benefit of doing so.
Is there any point in me saying that Paul comes highly recommended?
Romilla Ready, Lead Author, NLP for Dummies
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Claire Dickson, Former Management Development Director
with Dixons and United Biscuits
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Paul C Burr PhD
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Quick Guide VII – A Top-notch, Sales-Relationships, Account Management Template
Quick Guide VI – How to Sell Coaching
Available from Amazon and major bookstores:US UK & Createspace
Available from Amazon and major bookstores:US, UK & Createspace
Available from Amazon and major bookstores:US , UK also Createspace
Available from Amazon and major bookstores:US & UK also Createspace
Available from Amazon and major bookstores:US, UK also Createspace
Defrag your Soul
Available from Amazon and major bookstores:
Available from Amazon and major bookstores:UK,US also Createspace
Learn to Love and Be Loved in Return
My Shelfari bookshelf
- The Shack by Wm. Paul Young
- [ Chiron and the Healing Journey ] CHIRON AND THE HEALING... by Melanie R Reinhart
- Druidcraft Tarot Deck (Tarot Cards) by Phillip...
Retired: Business & Personal Performance Coach, Author, Researcher, Speaker, Energy Healer and Singer.